Ample sized balls, or, why I am moving to Ireland

Name: As Irish as they make them. First & last.
Googlable: Highly. We are talking legit Google Image search.
Age: 26
Height: 6”+
Occupation: Athlete
Alcoholic Units Consumed: Many
Non Alcoholic Units Consumed: 1
Time Expended: 18 hours
Scale on which my hotel believed me a trollop (1-10): 9.5
Overall Assessment: I can swing a 3 year visa independently, but then we really have [...]

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